when the heart explodes
Honestly? it was too scary... all the painful words keep playing over & over in my head and crushed me... Things i never expected came from him... he owez has dis goody nice guy image in my eyes and now... he's juz too scary... done it once, he'll do it again... It strucks me how bad he see's me in his eyes.... it stresses me to the point where i want to juz cried my heart out thinking i failed being a good gf... thinking how much i was a fool all this while for literaly loving him too much with every single piece of my heart..... dats how much his words can affect me... i dont think i can ever be okay after such words...
but then, i remember the thing i promise myself... doesn't matter how bad the world knock me down... no one... NO ONE can take the good away from me... i will not allow that... i am what i am.. i value my self when no one does... i always love myself when no one does... i never treat myself wrong... yes, im vain.. i am a narc... but it's better like that... i do what i like.. and i sealed my heart away from anything that could hurt it....
i may not valuable to anyone but im valuable to me... i may not be better than any girls but im in my own league... i play by my own rules, i am my own boss and my happiness lays in my own hand... it was owez like that... my heart lets me forget...
i wont anymore...
the rest... i leave it to faith.. just follow where it'll bring me to... im tired of thinking anymore... thinking too much and being too honest didn't get me anywhere... it'll juz hurt me over & over again... so screw it..
p/s: dis is me growing up
Posted via Blogaway
0 comments:
Post a Comment