Matter of the heart

| at 7:34 PM

I may look happy but no one knows what i'm feeling inside..

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The Ugliest Truth

| at 6:02 PM

Today i found out shocking truth that was hard for me to digest. I thought my misery is worst but what happened to my friends makes my heart heavier... Going through a break up from 7 years relationship was hard, it feels like i'm falling apart... Feels like i'm at the weakest point in my life.. too much lies & drama... too many heartbreaks... too many chances being wasted.. there's no use regretting everything that happened.. no use of blaming him and no use of asking why? because i never want to walk the same path as him anymore... i don't want to go through what i'm going through now & i can't take another heartbreak anymore... For know, i can't help feeling sad, disappointed, upset with the another lies and betrayal... i kept saying that i regret meeting him.. but i take those words back because to think about it again, within 7 years we were together, we had fun together & i was happy being with him... There were moments of heartbreaks and betrayals but there were also moments of true happiness.... Thus, i don't regret spending 7 years with him... but those were yesterday... before he put another hole in my heart.....again.... Thus, what's left are only histories & memories of a broken heart...

I'm letting the past go... trying to move on and heal the damage of my heart.. Doesn't matter how much i love him, he will never know... i thought after the last break up there will be no more 3rd woman's issues in our relationship but i guess i was wrong.. i lost hope & when he purposely did the typical mistake he always do especially after planning about wedding, that's when i know he's definitely not the one that i want to spend forever with... i never want to spend my life in misery... no one does... apologies & promises won't make up for everything.... i'm done with him... 

My break up was hard but there are other people who's suffering much more & is going on tougher situation than me... lies can kill the heart... The truth will always be better than eating lies all the time.... All the bad things that people do will never have a beautiful ending... what were they thinking? Hurting those who loved them wholeheartedly.... Maybe people just being plain stupid... but i wish things will get better for everyone who are experiencing heartbreaks like me... Time will pass and everything will just become memories.. May all of us get our own happiness & would found the one who will appreciate us in the future :)

"Laugh when you can, apologize when you should and let go of what you can't change. Life is too short to be anything.....but happy" - Anonymous



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The Final Break Up of 7 Years Relationship....

| at 4:49 PM

Audy - Dibalas dengan Dusta

semudah itu kau ucapkan
Kata maaf kekasihku
Setelah kau lakukan lagi
Kesalahan yang sama

Dimana perasaanmu
Saat kau melakukan salah yang sama
Inikah cara dirimu
membalas tulus cinta yang telah kuberi

Menyakitkan bila cintaku
Dibalas dengan dusta
Namun mencintamu
Tak kan kusesali karna aku yang memilihmu

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Primary to highshool buddies

Labels: | at 4:34 PM



I reached kk on the 15 of Aug & i felt relief as soon as i reached my home sweet home, the place where i grew up... doesn't matter how far i go... this is the place where i call home :) i told my cuz about my arrival & she asked to see me at the same day.... the excitement could be well understood since we could only meet each other once a year.... we went shopping & had a short karaoke session with another one of our highschool buddies, ira...

The three of us met in primary school & coincidently all three of us were admitted to the same highschool, St. Francis Convent.... so we've known each other for sooooooo long...  we've met, chit-chatting, updating each other with our lives & fooling around like we used to do... awww, i miss my high shool days... who doesn't, right? :) too much to do say, to many things to do together but too little time :(

Hopefully we could find more time to spend together like how we used to again ^^


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