The Other Side Of Me

"Ku pernah punya cinta.. namun kini ku sedang suka kamu..

Cintaku dulu telah ku buang jauh.. Kini ku ingin kamu....." 

(Raffi ahmad, Jangan Bilang Tidak)

Over the years, i've fallen in love... fell out of love.. got confused... been betrayed... ran away from reality, did things i won't be proud of, refusing to face the ugly truth, got swayed and hurt time over time.... lies cut me until i become lost in my way..  holding myself together and struggle to move on... There are tons of things that i wish would have been different... but i've let go of things i couldn't change...  all i ever wanted was to be happy but happiness seems too far away at that time... and i used to ask myself, why izzit so hard for me to be happy?

And i know you've gone through the same thing.... well, i think everybody does... people say the past will shaped us for who we are in the future... We learned from all the heartbreaks and the wrong decisions that we've made... There are things that i wish i've done but i didn't and there are things that i wish i didn't do... The past had turn my heart numb... and i was ready to settle with what i already had back then... 

but it seems like God has a different plan for me... Moving on was the most hardest part for every one but that was the best decision i've ever made... because one could never be truly happy if their heart still stuck with troubles of the past.... yes, we learned from it and moved on, end of story... 

With this numb heart, i found love that i never thought i would able to feel again... the love that could put a smile on my face like the entire day.... Thus, i learned to love again... yes, the road was never this smooth at the beginning, but what we have now is more that what i've ever wanted... I never expected anything when we've just started but it seems that things just happened and without we realized, we've come this far... I feel blessed... thankful... grateful... for i never thought that i finally found the happiness that i've always dreamed for... Now that i've found it, i wanna keep it til the rest of my life.... All the time i feel like i'm drowning in this love.... and i like how it consumes me... Yes, future is uncertain, but this awesome relationship is definitely worth fighting for... 

p/s: i'll take care of u for as long as i could :)